Something very lovely that I came across!!!
I Don’t Understand My Husband by Janet Perez Eckles
The lyrics to the 70’s Village People song, Macho Man, echo in my head. But that’s not my husband. He’s not a macho man; nor did he fulfill my dreams of marrying a muscular-bound hunk who, with one wink, would melt me to nothing. Instead, I married a man I cannot understand.
If you were to peek into our family room, you’d find my husband, Gene, on the recliner with a bowl of chocolate ice cream balanced on his slightly protruding belly, pausing only to press the buttons on the remote control. But if you ask him, he'd insist he's religiously committed to his exercise routine – every Memorial Day, Labor Day, or any other Monday holiday throughout the year.
Late at night, I call him to come to bed, but he doesn’t budge from the couch. His sniffs are a sure telltale sign that he's been moved, again, by one of his favorite movies…It's A Wonderful Life. Hmm. I wonder if my sons will grow up displaying that sensitive reaction, contrary to that of the typical macho man.
Nothing has changed over the years. Ever since my sons were small, and even during their teenage years, he'd throw his arms around them and hold them in a big bear hug. The fact their girlfriends watched with amazement didn't faze him. And I now see my oldest son follow his father's example by displaying the same affection toward his brother.
I scratch my head at the advice he gives them. Instead of emphasizing they need to strive to succeed, he tells them to make God first in their lives and repeats to them the only path to prosperity is to obey God's instruction to tithe. I sigh. He knows that a wife longs to have a man by her side not afraid to assert his beliefs and express his convictions.
And sometimes he teaches me lessons I never asked to learn. Many years ago, financial records showed employees had stolen from the business we ran at that time. He devised a plan. He announced to my boys and me that he had reached a compromise with those responsible. He asked them to repay only a fraction of what they had taken and agreed to drop the charges if they would be willing to listen to God's Word about forgiveness. He explained to our family that showing them to forgive as Christ forgave us held a higher priority than sending them to jail. Goodness, I just couldn't understand how he could be so kind to those who had wronged us.
Dealing with my parents is another area he handles with unusual flair. He readily agreed to invite them to live with us, but what leaves me in awe is his attitude toward them. He displays patience and so much love that I don't understand – after all, they're only his in-laws. I imagine he must know when he shows genuine care for them, it's an extension of the love he has for me.
Our life goes on. Even when I'm in a bad mood, he walks around the house attempting to sing without knowing the lyrics. And to baffle me further, no matter what goes on that day, he still kneels with me for our nightly prayer. This never-missed routine has been the glue that held us together even through moments when neither one of us understood life.
Perfect he's not, but he has a perfect way of displaying Godly qualities. I assume he peeked into the manual he must hide under the mattress, How to Be a Real Man. And he must have read that a husband earns his wife's total respect and admiration when actions follow his words.
Amazing me once again, when I lost my sight, he remained true to the vow he made on our wedding day – for better or for worse. I often ask myself how…just how did he manage to bring me out of my despair when my blindness plunged me into a pit of anger and left me feeling bitter, unproductive and ugly. And Gene, with his committed love and devotion, turned me into a queen…and that…I’ll never understand.
Now that Valentine’s Day is long gone, forever are the songs of gratitude in my heart because my husband brought clarity to Paul’s exhortation, Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her. (Ephesians 5:25).
Janet
Janet Perez Eckles is an international speaker, contributor to fifteen books, including the Chicken Soup for the Soul series and Guidepost, and author of the inspirational book, Trials of Today, Treasures for Tomorrow: Overcoming Adversities in Life. Visit Janet at www.janetperezeckles.com.
